I'm just really excited that I'm drawing again. I don't know if any one read my info (or is reading this) but I quit drawing for a few years. I don't know why I stopped, I guess to pursue other things and for some reason I never thought of it as an actual career.
I come from a small town, so when someone mention artist they think of someone that's broke, emotional, and can create things..... or a tattoo artist, and I was not gonna be one of those. Growing up in a small town, there was never anyone to tell me "Hey, you could be a concept design artist!" or "You know those video games you play, you can actually create those!" so I had to stumble upon it myself, and it took a while for it to click in my head that I could actually do that as a job.
So I gave up on it, on my art that is. I was also getting a ton of pressure from all my friends and family to draw them things, which I'm totally cool with, but it was a bit overwhelming. I'm still really unexpirenced and back then, just out of high school, it seemed to me that people only liked me for my art, which kind of stung (people in my town also think art should be free). So that gave me more fuel for the the fire to stop drawing.
I had stopped drawing for about 3-4 years when one day it dawned on my how much I missed drawing, and this overwhelming sadness came over me. I just let all my hard work go without fighting for it, just washed down the drain. I also didn't realize how drawing had been extremely therapeutic for me in extremely rough times in my life, and just the gratification in creating something that only I could think of was really empowering.
I wanted it back. I started drawing again, just for myself.... and I sucked. It was really discouraging to see all the progress I had lost. But I kept at it and slowly awoke the design side of me again. I started to challenge myself again with every piece, and also set a goal to actually finish each piece to completion (unfinished works haunt me). I was back to where I was before! YAY!
Then I switched to digital...... and it was like trying to relearn how to draw, not only that, but learn how to paint for the first time as well. But through trial and error, stepping back a couple times and taking a break here and there, I slowly got the confidence and practice to actually paint on the freakin computer! Its so exciting! Now it feels like the possibilities are endless, and maybe I could get a career actually doing something that I love.
I don't know if anyone will read this, but I just had to share cause my artwork has grown leaps and bounds, and I'm just too excited to not write about it, and hopefully will help someone that is stuck in the same situation.
Special shout out to Feng Zhu who kept me inspired through his free online cinema on Youtube, and taught me most the stuff I know on Photoshop. You rock!
Thank you all!